The famous Malakas

The word Malakas (Greek: μαλάκας) is the top cursing word for the Greeks. It can be used before and after each sentence, sometimes as an insult, just for fun, for more intensity or for no particular reason.

Read our special article: Malakas, one word, a thousand images

Malakas is a Greek slang word, whose literal equivalent in British English is wanker (and not asshole as many think), but the usage of the term varies. Common alternative meanings include asshole or jerk, and the contrasting dude, or mate, depending on the context.

There are numerous expressions with the word Malakas. These are the most common.

Negative

Πόσο μαλάκας είσαι; (Póso malákas íse?)
Literally & Meaning: How much of a wanker are you?

Μη γίνεσαι μαλάκας. (Mi gínese malákas)
Literally & Meaning: Don’t be an asshole

Κοίτα ένα μαλάκα. (Kíta éna maláka)
Literally: Look at an asshole Meaning: You are an asshole and everybody can see that

Μια ζωή μαλάκας. (Mia zoí malákas.)
Literally: Asshole for lifetime Meaning: You are always doing the same mistake.

Πόσα κιλά μαλάκας είσαι; (Pósa kilá malákas íse?)
Literally: How many kilos of an asshole are you? Meaning: What are you behaving like this?

Είσαι μαλάκας με περικεφαλαία. (Ise malákas me perikefalea)
Literally: You are a masturbator with helmet Meaning: You are a big malakas with a hat and everybody can spot that.

Είσαι ένας μαλάκας και μισός. (Ise énas malákas kai misós)
Literally: You are one and a half of an asshole Meaning: You are more than a malakas

Με πιάσανε μαλάκα. (Me pjasane maláka)
Literally: I got caught malakas Meaning: I got mocked

Πας καλά ρε μαλάκα; (Pas kala re maláka)
Literally: Where are you going? Meaning: Are you thinking straight?

Positive

Που σε ρε μαλάκα; (Pou ise re maláka)
Meaning: Where are you my friend?

Όχι ρε μαλάκα! (Οhi re maláka)
Meaning: oh nooooooooooo

Με άφησε μαλάκα. (Me afise maláka)
Meaning: He left me surprised

You will find many compound words which mean different things, but can be used for the same purpose.

Aρχιμαλάκας (Archimalakas = Top malákas), χοντρομαλάκας (Chodromalakas = Fat malakas), μαλακοβιόλης (malakoviolis = malákas with a violin), μαλακοπίτουρας (malakopitouras), μαλακοτρίφτης (malakotriftis = malakas with grater).

Or you can use the noun, malakia (μαλακία) = masturbation

Τον έφαγε η μαλακία! (Ton éfage i malakía)
Literally: He got eaten by masturbation Meaning: He procrastinated or did something stupid

Η μαλακία πάει σύννεφο (I malakía pái sinefo)
Literally: Masturbation goes cloud Meaning: Great stupidity all over place

Τον χτύπησε η μαλακία στο κεφάλι (Ton chtýpise i malakía sto kefáli)
Literally: Malakia hit him on the head Meaning: He doesn’t think straight

Maybe malakas is the dominant word and you can use it anywhere, but for lighter situations you can use:

Ηλίθιος, χαζός (Ilithios, chazos), χαλβάς, Meaning: Idiot, Stupid

Βλάκας (Vlakas), Meaning: Fool

Πόσο βλάκας μπορεί να είσαι? (Poso vlakas bori na ise)
Meaning: How stupid are you?

Ανόητος (Anóitos), Meaning: Silly

Mα, είσαι τελείως ανόητος; (Ma ise telios Anóitos), Meaning: Are you completely silly?

Μα τι χαλβάς είσαι εσύ! (Ma ti chalvás eísai esý!)
Literally: Don’t be chalvas (greek sweet) Meaning: Don’t be a pussy

Use Re(Ρε) for more impoliteness

If you want to be impolite with someone, just put the word “ρε” in the end of the sentence.

Τι θες ρε? (Ti thes re), Meaning: What do you want ρε?

Ξεκόλα ρε (Xekola re), Meaning: Get off ρε

Famous quote in the Olympic games of 1992 by the winner Voula Patoulidou ”Για την Ελλάδα, ρε γαμώτο” (Gia tin Elláda, re gamóto), Meaning: For Greece re gamoto!

Gamóto and Gamo = Fuck!

Another word that you will hear when greeks are swearing, especially in the car is Γαμώτο = gamóto, which means = fuck, zounds, neuken. This word can also be used among sentences and can mean a lot of things.

Here are some examples:

Γαμώ το κέρατό σου (Gamó to kérató sou), Meaning: Fuck your horn, Γαμώ την τρέλα μου γαμώ (Gamó tin tréla mou gamó), Meaning: Fuck my fucking madness, Γαμώ τον Δία (Gamó ton Día), Meaning: Fuck Jupiter

Αρχίδια (Archidia) = Balls

Expressions with balls are also really creative.

Αρχίδια καπλαμά (Archidia kaplama = Bollocks), αρχίδια μύδια (Archídia mýdia = balls mussels), αρχίδια με λουλούδια (Archidia me louloudia = Balls with flowers).

Τι κάνεις ρε αρχίδι? (Ti kánis re archídi?) Meaning: How are you doing?

Θα μου κλάσεις μία μάντρα αρχίδια (Tha mou klasis mia madra archídia)
Literally: You will fart me a junk yard with balls) Meaning: You can’t touch me.

Ξύσ' τ' αρχίδια σου με τον γκασμά (Xýse ta archídia sou me ton kasmá)
Literally: Scratch your balls with a garden tool Meaning: Whatever

Τσίμπα ένα αρχίδι (Tsímpa éna archídi)
Literally: Τweak a ball Meaning: You are not getting anything

Μη μου σπας τ’ αρχίδια (Mi mou spas ta archidia)
Literally & Meaning: Don’t bust my balls

Έπιασε τον παπά από τα αρχίδια (Epiase ton papa apo ta archidia)
Literally: He got the priest by the balls Meaning: He got very lucky

You can also use the word παπάρια (paparia) which means To our balls.

Πήραμε τα αρχίδια μας (Pírame ta archídia mas)
Literally: We got our balls Meaning: We got nothing

Pussy and dick

Μουνί (Mouní) in greek means vagina. There are numerous expressions with that, these are the most common.

Μουνί καπέλο τα έκανες (Mouní kapelo ta ekanes)
Literally: You did pussy with a hat Meaning: You did all wrong

Έπαθα μουνόπλακα (Epatha mounoplaka)
Literally: My pussy had been blocked Meaning: I was shocked

Είσαι μουνόδουλος (Ise mounodoulos)
Literally & Meaning: You are a slave of the pussy

Είσαι μουνόπανο (Eísai mounópano)
Literally: Vagina fabric, period pad Meaning: You are a slave of the pussy

Πούτσος (Poutsos) in greek means dick.

Είσαι για τον πούτσο (Ise gia ton poutso)
Literally: You are for the dick Meaning: Είσαι εντελώς άχρηστος

Πούτσες μπλε (Poutses mple)
Literally: Blue dicks Meaning: What you're saying is not valid

Για τον πούτσο (Gia ton poutso)
Literally: For the dick Meaning: It is not good

Στο μουνί μου / Στα αρχίδια μου / Στον πούτσο μου (Sto mouni mou / Sta archidia mou / Ston poutso mou) Meaning: I don’t care

Shit & Fuck

One of the most common curses in the greek language is: Δεν μας χέζεις ρε Νταλάρα; (Den mas chézis re Ntalára?).

Historical curse after a famous judicial confrontation between George Dalaras (famous singer) and Jimmy Panousi (Greek comedian).

Literally: Ntalara take a shit on us Meaning: We have heard bullshit again.

Also, Χέσε μας (Chese mas)
Literally: Take a shit on us Meaning: Whatever you say. Same meaning, Γάμησε μας (Gamise mas) Literally: Fuck us.

Σκατά τα έκανες (Skata ta ekanes), Meaning: You did shit

Έκανα το σκατό μου παξιμάδι (Ékana to skató mou paximádi)
Literally: I made my shit cracker Meaning: I lacked everything.

Σκατά στον τάφο σου (Skatá ston táfo sou)
Literally: Shit on your grave Meaning: I wish you the worst

Άντε γαμήσου να κάνεις καριέρα (Ánte gamísou na kánis kariéra) is another interesting phrase.
Literally: Go fuck yourself to make a career Meaning: Go and do something interesting with your life.

Σάλτα και γαμήσου (Salta kai gamisou)
Literally: make a leap and fuck yourself Meaning: Fuck off

Δε γαμείς που δε γαμείς, δε πάμε για ψάρεμα? (De gameís pou de gameís de páme gia psárema?)
Literally: We don’t fuck anyway so let’s go fishing.

Curse in the car like a Greek!

When you are driving and another driver cuts you:

Άι γαμήσου (Ái gamísou), Meaning: Go fuck yourself

Άι στο διάολο (και ακόμα παραπέρα) (Áei sto diáolo ki akóma parapéra)
Meaning: Go to hell (and beyond)

Άι σιχτίρ (Ái sichtír) Foreign (non greek) expression for: Go to hell

Να σου καεί το pc / το video / το σπίτι (Na sou kaei to pc / to video / to spiti)
Literally: I wish you pc to broke down / your video to broke down / you house to be burned up Meaning: I want something bad to happen to you.

Don’t try this at home

By adding clever, many swear words together you can make a mega one!!!

Αρχιδοπουτσομουνοκωλοψωλλοκαυλογλύφτης
Αρχιδο- πουτσο - μουνο - κωλο - ψωλλο - καυλο - γλύφτης
Balls - Cock - Pussy - Ass - Cock - Cock - licker (the one who licks)

Αρχιδοπουτσομουνοκωλοσκυλολαμογιοτριποκλειδαρότρυπα
Αρχιδο - πουτσο - μουνο - κωλο - σκυλο - λαμογιο - τριπο - κλειδαρότρυπα
Balls - cock - pussy - ass - dog - crook - keyhole

What we kept outside

Greeks have a lot of swear words that are sexist, homophobic and racist but we choose to keep them all out. In case we forgot these kind of swear words in our post, please let us know and fuck, shit and sorry :)

Also as a very religious country (pure orthodox) we have a great love of swearing in everything that is saint. We have no respect for anything, when we are mad, we know that! Just put: Γαμώ το / την / το ……. and fill the gap with any religious word like Γαμώ τον αντίχριστό μου (Gamó ton antíchristó mou = Fuck my antichrist ).

Greeks are shameless when they are swearing. Maybe because they have a lot of reasons to do so, in the car, in the tax office, in their business environment. They are not afraid to attack at religion, family, your mama, your house or your home appliances. The greek language is really creative and the greeks have taken advantage of that, getting the first place in their national sport: Swearing!